This round of chemo has been very difficult for me. Nelson and I had some questions about the bone marrow transplant and so against my better judgment I went out looking for the answer. In the process I came upon blog after blog of children who have passed. This consumed all my time and thoughts. I started looking at Aubree as if she had no chance at all. This weighed heavily on my heart, and if you can imagine it made time up here very rough. I dont know why, I didnt even know these people, and every case really is its own despite what the stats are. I am doing much better, Nelson gave me a priesthood blessing and I am doing so much better, in fact I have done a 180 and I know look to the future with Aubree, I know that she will make it. But my heart hurts tonight as I read a blog of a patient that I do know. She was the family that I watched as her sister gave her bone marrow to save her sister. I talked to her mother about the procedure as I myself was going to have to do the same thing. I do not know what has since happened with this family, but my heart goes out to them. I am so thankful for the love of our Heavenly Father and all that he does for us. I am so grateful for priesthood blessings that make going through this so much easier. I am thankful for the peace that the spirit brings, for the spirit that is here in this hospital. I am just so thankful for the love of everyone around me, and the support that is given to me on a daily basis by wonderful parents and siblings. I one day wish to be with them in eternity. I have learned how fragile life is, and at any time it can be ripped from us. For this reason I am grateful that I have the beliefs that I do, that no matter what happens, I will be a forever family.
www.prayforari.blogspot.com
Autumn - I'm so sorry to hear how hard this last round has been for you. I looked at the link you posted and it breaks my heart. I know that many people in the ward will be fasting for you guys this weekend.
ReplyDeleteAutumn, the internet and all the research info and blogs I would read used to get me down too. It's a difficult thing because I would want to look up other people's situations, but it was always so sad to read about those that didn't make it. Aubree is a strong fighter! We'll be praying for her and we'll add her (and your son) to our fast on Sunday that the bone marrow transplant works!
ReplyDeleteI was also just amazed with the faith of Arianna's parents. They told me that it would only be moments before they would see their little girl again--that she would pass through the veil and that they would be there with her only moments later. That has given me a great deal of comfort knowing that whatever happens, it'll only really last a moment.
ReplyDeleteI love your sweet little family. I agree with Jill--she really is a fighter, killing off that cancer only after the first round! We'll keep praying that the transplant will be bearable.