Monday, January 24, 2011
Aubree is almost done with this round of chemo. She has one dose left at 6 am and then she is done. It was a short round but it seems to have been hard on her. She is more nauseated this time, and her energy is gone. Today she would be awake for 15 to 30 minutes and then have to take nap. Some of the problem is that she is in need of blood. She will get it in the morning after her chemo. I am surprised that her numbers dropped so fast this time, she still an ANC of 1100 and her platelets are still pretty high. But they have all dropped a ton since they ran tests the first day. I dont know why but this round of chemo seems to be so much harder for me. I keep thinking about the bone marrow transplant and all that will come with that. I am very hopeful that it will work and it will be the end of the road for us with treatment. But I have been reading a lot of blogs lately and I dont know if I am reading only the blogs of people that havent survived or if not a lot of people do survive from this diagnosis. I know that its not about numbers, but its more about if Aubree's time is up here, or if she has more things that need to be done. I try not to think about these things but at times you cant help but think about them. I cant talk to people about it either, its hard to try to find the words to express yourself when these thoughts are running through your head. I just pray that Aubree will survive and that we will be able to watch her grow!